Let’s Go to the BBQ versus Let’s Go to the Beach

It seems like my days of exclusively dating African-American sistas are really coming to an end hard and fast. Sistas are running around talking up crap on blogs about divesting from brothas but damn, who wants to in invest in what African-American women are about today? The truth of the day is good Black men got options worldwide when it comes to sistas and globalization is playing a big role in that. As I Walked to My Car.. Let me tell you my most recent experience and I don’t want to give away too much information. I was at a restaurant where this super fine African sista with a natural curvy body (really nice round booty) and natural curly hair had served me lunch for the past several weeks. I had conversations with her about where she from in Africa and I even let her know she is a beautiful lady. It was just a casual conversation but friendly and flirty but I’m just being me. Okay, one day I was hungry and stopped at the restaurant again didn’t think she worked that day. I actually was being served by the other guy from Africa who was being cool and I saw her again serving the other side of the room. I waved at her and she smiled but she was busy and working hard so I thought nothing of it. I paid my for my lunch and walked out towards my car. When I pulled my door handle, I saw the African sista who used to serve me come out of the restaurant, saying “hi!” to me and walking towards me with a big glowing smile. I wanted to see if something was wrong and she just told me she wanted to say bye. I smiled and thanked her and told her I will be back soon because the food is so good. I watched her walked away back into the restaurant, got in my car and didn’t turn on the engine because I was reflecting. See, this is how African-American women used to treat us brothas back in the days with that country/southern hospitality but that was 20 to 30 years ago. See, I became glad and sad at the same time because that was the first time in 20 to 30 years a Black women even done something like to me and it was sad because I’m looking at all of the African-American women I dated in my past and how shitty and unloving 90% of those African-American sistas were towards me with their attitude and mannerism. Primal Mating Instincts I had to edit this article because I had five more stories of women I dated worldwide but I was just being way too detailed about going jeep riding along the mountainside with a Latina sista in Central America, hanging out with a Blasian sista when I was in Tokyo (this was spontaneous), and some of the conversations I had with African sistas who shook the core of my Black DNA of how we brothas and sistas should be towards each other instinctively. All of these sistas from overseas were nice, had beautiful manners towards me and I discovered a natural mating ritual going on that my primal instincts picked up on. I will never forget that feeling or experience and it was the real and natural experience of a man encountering a women that I never got from my Westernized upbringing. But when I’m going out with an African-American sista, I don’t get that primal feeling of the natural mating process going on – all I get from her is vibes of made-up bullshit and the feeling I have to “run game” on an African-American sista to get her attention. To be fair, this is probably not the African-American sista fault but our Eurocentric Westernized upbringing as many sistas in Asia and these “princesses” from other countries that grew up in America have that same shitty attitude. Quite frankly, after going through that primal instinct feeling of the natural mating process and natural attraction to a woman, I don't ever want to deal with that Westernized bullcrap ever in my life again, if you want me to be honest. The Environment and Setup So now the sistas from overseas introduced me and awoken my primal instincts to the natural mating process and I realize how they did it and how the African-American sistas did not. When I was overseas or even in America, I noticed what the overseas sistas wanted to do with me. They all wanted me to go do simple things that didn’t cost a lot of money. Like go to a big park reserve and walk and hang out, go to the beach, go to an outside café or coffee shop. The finest women I ever dated in my life and also the finest women I ever saw in my life was a sista from Guinea-Bissau. The funny part was I was waiting on an African-American sista who is always late and this bilingual French-speaking African sista approached me, asked me if I’m African and gave me her phone number. The finest women I ever met in my life, she just wanted to hang out at Starbucks. Now, my history with African-American sistas and I’m going to make only one exception – sistas in New York City. Anybody who knows me know that I absolutely love sistas from New York, especially Queens and Brooklyn sistas. But outside of New York City, my experience with sistas is they want me to spend a lot of money on them going out to eat here and there, go watch this play or movie or concert with them and all this other silly ass prerequisites before we get some quality time together. But here is the problem with African-American sistas – okay, I spend all this damn money and pretending like I’m rich around this chick and we finally get together at a spot. No primal mating instinct feeling..just the type of unfulfilling lame sex cats much seen in these porn movies where you just get some cheap orgasm and want to go do something else afterwards. I don’t care if a sista is stimulating my frenulum against her clitoris while my shaft agitates her internal erogenous zone to the point of orgasm in the reverse cowgirl position; the sex is lame because I have to keep thinking of all the bullshit and money I spent to even get to this point. Had Enough and Not Going to Take It Anymore All this African-American women “friends first” bullshit and all these sistas saying to me “I like a man that..” but she got a history of f*cking knucklehead cats with dirty d*cks and everything else, I’m tired of it and I don’t want that shit in my life anymore because it never made me happy. I’m just going to call it and say real talk, I’m just plain and simple tired of dealing with African-American women bullshit all my life and rather deal with some other sistas bullshit just to try something different. The incident where that African sista ran out after me leaving the restaurant that was the breaking point because it was the first time in a long time a Black woman went out her way to acknowledge this non-celebrity regular brotha. I thought about riding shotgun in a jeep with a sista from Argentina in Central America and out of the blue she told me that I was a good man and she can see it in my eyes and heart – no African-American sista ever told me that in her life, even if she believed that was true. Sistas in America be giving me that look on how they going to run some scheme or game on me like I’m stupid and ish. Well, I’m not stupid nor emasculated and that makes me incompatible with 90% of the African-American women out there. And this is what I learned about women overseas that makes African-American women stupid and I know because I’ve been dating African-American all my life and know what I’m talking about. I noticed African-American want a brotha to go eat at some restaurant, go to the movie, go to a concert or play, go to a club or lounge and all that other stuff. That’s where African-American sistas f*ck up at that foreign women take advantage of to get a Black man. See, the dumb ass African-American sistas be taking a brotha to a place he is distracted and cost a lot of money. Go eat at a restaurant where the wait staff bothers us every 6 minutes while we are talking. Go to a movie where I’m staring at the screen and not paying her any attention – that’s what African-American women do. Go look at some closet-homosexual play or one of his movies and wonder why she brought a brotha to see this ignorant crap. But I realize a foreign sista knows the primal instincts of a man and the mating process. African sista take a brotha to Starbucks coffee on a Saturday night? Did you figure that one out? Because she was smart enough to put a brotha in a situation where she is the center of attention and a brotha gives all his attention to her. I go out with an Indian sista and she brings her dishes with rice in one plastic container and chicken and some spices and make my plate and we sit somewhere quiet or at my house. The Asian sista ask if I would like some tea and we sit together and make the tea together and pour our own cup and let it cool off. All of these women put a brotha in a situation where she is the center of all attention; this is what African-American women do not do. Chasing Love, Not Sex When it comes to sex, African-American women use sex as a trophy or end-game and this is why Black-on-Black love has been a f*cking failure since the 60s. Talk to any African-American women today and she got tons of bullshit game in the way of having sex with a brotha and straight trying to run game holding sex over his head like a carrot. Sistas overseas are smarter and I realize exactly what they are doing. They ain’t looking for sex or even place value on sex like that; they will make love to a brotha like a king the first night if we want to be real about it. What foreign sistas use as the trophy or end-game is love – that is what we all want at the end of the day and they know how to pursue the real goal. It’s funny because African-American women actually believe Black men run to Brazil for sex – no, it’s something else other than sex, my Afro-American sistas - get a damn clue. The sista overseas is always smiling and chasing us brothas and we pay attention to her. When I setup a date with a sista from Africa, we are not going to the mall, not going to the show, not going out to eat at Frank Ski restaurant – we are going to Starbucks and sit on the couches! I’m going straight to her spot and we are going to eat together and talk like grown-ups – she is welcoming me in her world and making sure I see her at the center of attraction. She is naturally setting up not only the mating process, but the whole process of finding a mate – that is why they can snatch up African-American brothas, the good brothas with new money at the rate they are doing today while African-American sistas have sex toy parties and masterbate with those toys all by themselves. Not Going to Settle for Some Ignorant Hateful Ish Anymore So yeah, sistas here in America can talk all the ish they want about us Black men and keep trying to tear us down and talk down on us like they got options. No, we brothas especially us who got our ish on, we are the one with options. A big butt and a smile is not patented by African-American women, every brown nation on this planet, their sistas got bodies built like that. And I can testify their doggy style is just as good if not better than any African-American sista doggy style so let’s put that one out there to end all doubts and rhetoric. So I wish a African-American sista would come at me saying go chase them sistas from overseas like her American ratchet behind won’t miss this brotha because I will do nothing but smile all back in her face because I definitely won’t be missing her negative African-American Black ass either.

10 thoughts on “Let’s Go to the BBQ versus Let’s Go to the Beach

  1. Sorry you feel that way brutha. I am from NYC btw and so is my bf so I feel you on that tip. The problem with a lot of my sisters in US is that they have not been modeled as to what real love looks like other than what they see on tv. It’s a tragedy. But becareful across the pond to my man they also have their hidden agenda…they just have a sweeter smile and talk.

  2. WOW!! I will start off by saying I agree with some of what you are saying as far as going on dates where the woman is not the center of attention. I totally agree.

    However, I just hate when black men are always like I am done with the black woman and the other nations of women are better than you because(whatever reason that has made you insecure that you refuse to forgive) when you just stated that you have witnessed other nations of women who have been raised in the Western world that act the exact same way. And admitted you believe it is due to basically the brainwashing of the the Euro-Centric westernized world we have grown up in.
    When the Euro women have the same values and customs of dating as the African American women, hence where we would obviously get it from since weve been brainwashed to this way of thinking.

    But, since Miss Ghana and miss Blasian and Miss Central America Latina( All who are of mixed origin and not fully black) and also they have “Good hair and natural curvers” they are all of a sudden better…. Is you kidding me spend more time with any woman (coming from a woman) you will be surprised….lol
    Did you ever think that since you are an American visiting their country they may be interested in you to maybe pick your brain?? See what the Black American man is really all about??
    How else would you conquer some ones time and pick their brain if it not be with flattery and a bit of low maintenance company? How else would you possibly secure a green card coming off nagging and demanding expensive dates had you not even left the country??? Come on……..Not to say that is what they want. But how else would you capture a tourists time??? Starbucks around the corner, Show some scenery off like the park and give him a tour to make him feel welcome and want to return.

    Please stop talking at the black woman, you do that alot in all your posts. Show some love. You admitted you know the black woman is lost. There are bad seeds in every race. A young 18 year old sweet black little virgin interested in business may come along and read you posts and then BOOM you kill her self esteem. I already told my daughters if you black the Black man dont want you… Be single and don’t marry until the Lord sends a man your way…. That is all

  3. Now if Im a black woman with nappy hair and no curves am I wrong for trying to acquire a perm and maybe a brazillian butt lift so that a self hating black man will want to be with me???

    In the black man eyes I am the scum of the earth and I am worthless with no self love because I do this knowing good and well the black man won’t pay me any attention because Miss Blasian and Miss Brazil is stacked!!! And you know what they love themselves and they love the black man and they are not out here getting criticized yet they are getting chased and pursued and treated well simply because of their looks and the desired body features the black man covets so much he will shun his own woman/ Black women would be the happiest creatures on earth if only their men would cherish them and we know they don’t/

    But Miss Brazil is 100% justified in prostituting her big ole booty to black self hating tourists because she is bad as a mutha and it is a bonafide hustle and sadly Brazil is not the richest of countries even though they have an awesome tourist industry with plenty of hotels where she could probably get a job and earn an honest wage. But its okay for her to get her hustle on with complete strangers who are more than likely married, disease infected,scum, etc. But its alright because she’s so low maintenance minus the tricking fee and has a great big ole smile with a matching booty….

    #stop demonizing the black woman!……… Please sir( In my most submissive voice, said with a big smile and my head facing the ground, not daring to look you in the eye, and im stacked with a big ole booty, and Im 23% spanish and 16% white I hope that will buy me some mercy from you)

  4. Dear black women always demonized,

    I noticed you didn’t mention anything about the “natural mating process” and the whole art of attracting a mate, the core of this article. How can you miss that most fundamental point to this whole topic?

    Your Miss Ghana and Miss Brazil and even Miss Blasian depending on where they from were taught and do know how to use their natural primitive sexiness to attract a man naturally..what are sistas in America doing in terms of the natural mating process – hiding behind weaves and colored contact lenses?! Yeah, that really works in attracting us men…no, it does not.

    I truly hope you understand the whole point here and I’m a mature person that already been there and done that and don’t speak out the side of my neck. Any real brotha, I don’t care who he is – his primal mating instincts will kick in if a women knows how to trigger them naturally and women outside of America know how to do that because they have not been tainted – that’s reality…

  5. Also, you missed the point about sex – let me explain again – a sista in Asia or Brazil may have sex with a dude in the first night, so what? But guess what – the brotha already past the stage of trying to get some and he is at the stage of loving her beyond the sex – she already figured out how to lure him in and she got him at the level she truly want him at, chasing love. When American sistas figure this one out, then maybe we can have Black on Black love.

  6. Oh okay so a brotha is in the love zone on the first night once he gets off. That’s a naive brotha for real, probably high off dopamine.
    So, the black woman has been getting criticized for years for being easy and it turns out that this is really the way to love. Despite all the single mothers out here from one night stands, and the lowest marriage rates out of all nations.Despite the fact of the bible instructions on how to mate.

    Any man that is taking a neck rolling, teeth sucking , frowning, bad attitude sista out on high maintenance dates is doing it solely to get “some”. I doubt she is an ugly and flat booty sista.
    You deserve all the attitude and waste of time you get because men know their true intentions.

    Men need to stop misrepresenting the facts the black woman is smiling and exuberating all the primitive mannerisms at first or else she wouldnt make it to the expensive dates, etc….. Then the black man rears his ugly head—- cheat, rude, looking at other women, talking about his past failed relationships with the black woman, constantly puts the black woman down in general, doesnt want to pay for the date that he asked her out to and agreed to the spot :then gets there when the bill due and want to change the topic to going dutch, shows personality disorder and double mindness, consistently talks about her azz,I could go on and on. Then the black woman has her epiphany “This nijja hates me!!”

    Trust me all women are naturally materialistic. Even the bible says women are worldly. Nature gives a big clue who spends the most money in retail??? Women.

    Please believe Miss Latina boyfriend is getting called all kinds of puto and bendeja when she comes home with that Starbucks that you brought that Juan couldnt afford. Please believe it.

    But whatever I missed some valid points because all the “dumb black woman” and bashing caught me off guard. I re read it and agree with a few points and have taken notes.

  7. Man I totally agree, Dating African American women or American women in general does not feel the same as dating foreign women.

  8. “So u wanna BLAME ME???!!”(A BLACK WOMAN’S CRY OF 394 YEARS) BY “MZ.B” © March, 2013.
    ********************************************************************************************************************************

    So u wanna BLAME ME???!! When I’ve been your Black tea? Strong, 2 the 10th degree, when u were bound: I made u feel free! But u wanna Blame Me… Yeah, U wanna blame me, All this love u can’t see…

    U wanted me quiet, blend in & lighten up. U wanted “compliance” with my loving cup, Told the sun: don’t u touch me, cuz my Man don’t like dark! I’ll work hard, use some bleachin’ creme, keep him happy so he won’t disembark.

    I Saw u watchin’ foreign women!” Saw your black Manhood rise, I had booty b4 she did, Can’t u see MY BEAUTY with your eyes???? STRESS! I lost weight, got “thinSuzy” but it wasn’t enough, Cuz U lusted 4 fake! A Manufactured body, u know, like “Buff’s”

    So I did what I could cuz I wanted U pleased. Learned 2 do it like “them” everyday on my knees… But I wasn’t EXOTIC, my brown skin bored your soul, U watched porn-got turned on, & U freaked me! Let u use every hole!!

    I was tired-so tired, worked my job every day, But I’d do anything, JUST to make my Black Man stay. I caught U with Maria! “D
    Had your children, worked doubles, always made sure we ate, U were bitter, unhappy & so full of SELF HATE.
    But I held onto my faith, as U did your own thing, As our sons became players watchin’ Daddy have flings.

    From day 1: I’ve been with U, every struggle we faced, Cried so hard when they sold U, from ole Massaz place.
    Willie Lynch messed up your mind baby!, It’s 2013, & it still ain’t right!! Cuz they stripped u of your Manhood. with those white hoods in the night.

    I feel sorry 4 U, but Black Man: But my King: U must Rise!!! When they sold u, they raped me! U cd NOT hear my cries!!!!!! But I ain’t let it stop me, from loving & HONORING U, Even though U mistreat me, Black Man I STILL love U!!

    See, we BOTH went thru hell, we can’t hide from this pain, WE MUST RISE UP & DO RIGHT! LION: SHOW THEM YOUR MANE!!
    I will work by your side, but PLEEEEEASE don’t put me down! Cuz you’re breaking my spirit: Sayin’ I’m a “Bitter Bitch” Clown!.

    U’ve got “ED-JAmaCaShun,” cuz it’s 2013, If we just worked TOGETHER: Baby! We cd be MEAN!
    Now u leave me 4 others, & u say I’m to blame, I know love has no color BUT of “ME” your ashamed?!!!??!

    Throughout time I’ve forgiven, so I won’t hold this on U. So Black Man just go be happy! Don’t hurt “her” be honest & True. BUT, Give me my Respect, cuz I’ve done all I could, So my mind can rest easy, I’m just Misunderstood…

    Black women bare the Burden, for the Man & his child. We made it thru hell, & our burdens compiled. We gave U all that we had, TELLDATRUTH! Be4real-don’t play games!! But if u need a scapegoat, goneHEAD! I’LL take the blame…

    Cuz u wanna BLAME ME. When I’ve been your good, Black tea!. Strong, 2 the 10th degree!
    When u were bound,: MY LUV made u feel free! But u wanna Blame Me, Cuz All this love u can’t see…

    Dammmm what else can I do??!” U & I once wore shackles- it’s true, But I’m still NOT = goodEnuff 4 U.
    Look in the mirror & u’ll see ME… When u blame me: u blame WE!

    But u wanna blame me………………………….

    (Mz. B)

  9. I’m British Caribbean living in Atlanta and there are some differences between foreign sistas and American sistas. We are less materialistic and superficial. I personally prefer brothas who are well-traveled/cultured and I’m not finding it easy to meet those types of guys here. Then again it could all come down to where I socialise. They are intrigued by my accent but it rarely occurs to the brothas that I may find them a little dull. I think brothas need to step their game up and become more worldly and cultured. I even asked a male friend why men here don’t seem to talk much. He says because we don’t travel or have anything to talk about other than football. I think brothas should stop focusing on the faults of sisters and improve upon themselves, as a I foreigner I see character flaws in them too.

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