One of the thing a mature brotha recognize is he cannot seriously deal with a sista that prays too much and goes to church too much talking about her pastor. It is already bad enough you see these same saved sistas asking for greasy pork bacon to go with their eggs when you at the café ordering breakfast but this whole churchy crap among the sistas is just extremely sad and self-marginalizing. My impression of the Black church with the so-called pastor is that Black women spent the last 30 years patronizing offshoot ghetto mentality Protestant churches like borderline micro-cults designed to take a sista money just to tell her whatever she want to hear. Real church is organized action, not organized sermon and prayer. Any bum on the street can do a street corner sermon and anyone with a mouth can do prayer. The problem with sistas is as much as they talk about prayer, you just look right at her and see that all she does is run her mouth and perform no action. I dated churchy Black women and when something happen, they screaming all loud and start mumbling some prayer while things are going down. Then I dated other sistas when things go down, she springing into action handling things and making stuff happen right then and there. And guess what? When you are about action, then you truly recognize the power of God because that is what God is about, making things happen. Sitting around talking about prayer is the biggest crap I ever heard and I’m trying to figure where this crap came from. The problem with prayer is these are people just running their mouth and it cannot be clearer than that. Real talk – check them out when they talk about prayer and look all at them. You will notice all they doing is talking and hope the words that come out of their mouth will manipulate you to agree with their viewpoint. But most important, so-called prayers are really the most selfish crap I ever heard of in my life. Because when someone says they will pray for someone, what they really saying is they are not going to take actions and will just talk to themselves to absolve themselves of caring about someone else problem. So if a sista said she lost her job and have an interview tomorrow and I don’t give a care about her, I will simply tell her I will pray for her. But if I care about her, I will go into action and ask her if she need any help with the interview and make sure I share my experience and drive a sista to the interview watching her kids in the car in the parking lot. That’s taking action and God is about taking action, not talking. It’s funny because if you read Dream and Hustle for a while, I have pointed out over and over again Black people love to run their mouth about anecdotal. Black folks always have a cousin who prayed and they were cured of stage iv cancer or someone prayed for money and won $300 from the off-track-betting facility. Black people love some talking about what other people went through or like to make up some cute fiction testimony about what they been through and how prayers changed everything – real talk, go ahead and read and listen to Black people conversations and you will notice I’m right about the anecdotal crap. Then someone says “amen” to that anecdotal story about prayer and Black people been running that ghetto protestant hustle for the longest time in our community. Then when it comes to church, it’s basically a manipulation game of weak-minded sistas. Sistas give her money up as tithes, sistas be looking and fighting over pretty boys in the church not realizing he is HIV positive or just got out of jail, pastor be telling these sistas something she want to hear. Now let’s stop here – I didn’t say the pastor be doing something for these sistas that she need to hear – I said the pastor be saying something these sistas want to hear. You then realize that cats like Tyler Perry, Steve Harvey and who is that midget character – yeah, Roland Martin – all of them stole the same formula from the ghetto protestant church to hustle the sistas to make money telling sistas what she wants to hear. And you know that is the game the shady brothas play right in the name of God? The brothas go in church, find a sista, he get her to talk about what’s wrong with her and her negative problems and then the brotha talk about praying with her, he calling her to see if she alright and he basically go through the routine of talking his way into having casual sex with her – 2 to 3.5 week timeframe. Then he runs off to another church his boys told him about and run the same script over again. Then the sistas at the new ghetto protestant church be like “who is this new brotha?” and the sistas at the new church start fighting over this snake brotha. The funny part is this is 2014 – we all know the sistas know this is going on but she allow it to happen. I got one brotha bragging some dumb church chick here in Atlanta paying for him to go with her on a vacation in the Caribbean and he don’t even know her. So let’s just put it out there – the Catholic Church promotes marriage and family as well as Judaism while Islam and Hindu promotes arrangement of marriages and you have even the most basic tribes in Africa where the focus is on finding a mate to raise a family. But the ghetto protestant Black church do not promote family and marriage – it currently promotes opportunist dudes f*cking weak-minded sistas and getting her to pay up tithes. But guess what happens when a sista get smart to the game? The church actually makes move to kick her out of the church! This is real talk! If a sista expose that cats in the church are f*cking all the sistas, the pastor and the elder all-male flock and the elder women who being screwed also make a move to get that agitator sista out of the church and even file restraining orders! The Real Talk for Sistas When It Comes to Religion Look sistas, you are going to see these fake ghetto xtians run their damn mouth and they will think their vocabulary can manipulate which is what snakes and con artists do – try to talk to you and they gang up as a cult on you and think they can group talk you sistas to see things their way. But you sistas have to look around with the eyes God gave you and recognize that ghetto protestant church ain’t promoting family and marriage and community like the Amish or the Catholics be doing and call out BS when you see it. If you ain’t seeing action and just hearing holy words like “spiritual” and stuff like that, you sistas need to recognize religious-based garbage and a hustle when it’s all in your face. The first thing a sista need to do is leave the ghetto protestant church and leave those clowns behind. Stop trying to admire pastors who are just mortal males and learn to establish a personal relationship with God. A relationship with God can take you sistas to the other side of the world and to the tallest mountain while a relationship with a ghetto protestant church can only take you into petty drama and stress you don’t need right now. Stop letting these Black men preying in these ghetto protestant churches run around talking about they so holy and righteous and all that other crap – they just trying to keep a conversation with you sistas so you can get comfortable around them and you eventually give them some booty. You sistas know that’s the game – we brothas call you, talk to you, spend time with you and you sistas ignore all the other brothas and just let one of us brothas talk to you and you sistas eventually get comfortable and give up the booty – that’s been the mating game for 1,000s of years but the ghetto protestant church just perfected that mating game and use your sistas as lambs to the slaughterhouse. After you sistas leave the church and you decide to establish a personal relationship with God, then accept your womanhood. Accept being a mother, accept dating and being a girlfriend in good quality relationships, accept being a wife in a good quality relationship. But most important, start doing things you sistas want to do like start your own business, start travelling, start speaking up on issues affecting women and do with while you have that strong bonded relationship with God and don’t let anybody come between you and your relationship with God. And here is the most important thing sistas need to take away and realize – the real cats who are about God are not running their mouth but they are out there taking action. If your house is burning down, do you want the dude at the church who pray and talk about spiritual or do you want the Chicago Firefighter that makes $80,000/year who runs in and kicks in the door where you children are trapped and bring them out, go back in and bring out your pet parakeet and give your pet parakeet mouth-to-mouth resuscitation? You sistas need to recognize the real men who are about it and learn to find these men. Men who are out there taking action ain’t got time to sweet talk you sistas out of your panties - we real men got real work to do in this real world. It is your responsibility as a sista to find real people and bring people in your life who are about it and about action and surround yourself with positive people. Now for the xtian crazies who going to come around and say “prayers work” and other cutesy spiritual stuff, just remember that these people are selfish morons. They will see someone else suffer and they will say “I will pray for them” which means they ain’t willing to do anything but close their eyes and pretending they talking to some omnipotent deity to take care of a situation you going through instead of taking personal action to help you out. Sistas, stop letting people come around you running their mouth – tell them to shut up talking to you and be blunt. Become focused only on your personal mission and only deal with people who are about action and free yourself from the worthless cats who trying to manipulate you with God. No one can manipulate you about God or talk to you about God when you have a personal relationship with God. And as soon as you sistas establish that relationship with God, you will see these ghetto protestant clowns and their rhetoric disappear from your life. You will start meeting friends and peers who are about action and you will find purpose and fulfillment. You will start doing things like join a running club with positive actionable people, bring toys to a shelter for the kids with the same money you used to tithe some pastor with, start traveling to Italy and hang out in Florence and just enjoying your life. I’m sorry to say but as a real Black man, I simply cannot deal with the churchy sistas who are weak-minded and stuck in a cult-like ghetto religious system paying some pastor tithes and just about talking and emotional letting too much. I like a sista that has a relationship with God and found her personal purpose and out there doing actionable things with the life she got to make things better for herself and others. And most important, I don’t do sistas that pray to God, I like to be with sistas where we celebrate having a personal relationship with God through our actions. The sistas need to leave the ghetto protestant church, seek out her true womanhood, establish a relationship with God and take action that gives her purpose and fulfillment.