The Black Woman Guide to Protecting Her Daughter against Black Male PUA Culture

protection The recent mass shooting by Elliot Rodger is a teachable opportunity for sistas to review the modern culture of lame black males and the activities these brothas are engaged in that can be harmful to our sistas. The Pickup Artist or PUA subculture online is a structured threat not mostly against grown sistas but against young sistas who are targeted by young black boys and older black men looking to take advantage of our young sistas with some nonsense called “game” and older sistas have to deal with this black male PUA to protect our little girls. Black women need to understand that sistas are structurally targeted by people inside the black community, even black women like Cathy Hughes at Radio One – she ain’t your damn friend. These black radio stations play negative songs degrading and objectifying women to target the young black male to just believe he can “game these hoes” and you see the music videos of cats portraying the same scenario with women. You watch black movies, even Tyler Perry crap and it’s all about some kind of scripted encounter of a brotha and a sista – Tyler Perry ain’t your damn friend either. So there is a constant mainstream media propaganda out there that portray black women as easy to get if a brotha just do this or do that. I won’t even talk about Essence magazine telling sistas a place to meet brothas is at a strip club. And I’m going to share my personal experience which is most >95% black women are complicit as hell enabling black male PUA culture to the point I have difficulty dealing with African-American women. A lot of black women are conditioned to believe that “Jesus will bring her a man” and she sitting there waiting for some guy to approach her. I’m testifying as a real black man – black women are sitting around waiting for me to approach them with some damn “game” instead of her approaching me and I’m approaching her mutually. I wrote about this a long time ago in frustration sharing my experience with Asian and African and Latino sistas approaching me and we hit it off. But I see black woman just sitting over there appearing interested in me but got that look like she expecting me to approach her and drop some “game” and ish. So let’s not ignore the fact that some black women are conditioned to enable PUA activity among black men and think this is how a black man should approach a black women, using “game”. Let me make something damn clear - there is no "game" and why cultures have arranged marriages and also have love festivals where men can court women because there is a community structure setting to put good brothas with good sistas. And because we do not have this structure in our black culture here in America [they have this in other black cultures around the world], we got clowns talking about "game" and crap. Do you see the Brazilian black brothas talking about running "game" on their sistas? Yeah, thought so. PUA in the black community is promoting anti-black love and we better fight for black love here in America and not tolerate this crap. So how did PUA manifest over the Internet? Basically, it is simple – when a brotha who can’t get a chick see another brotha with a chick that he want so bad, that lame brotha start wondering why is she with him? What did he do to get a girl like that? That happens with me all the time here in Atlanta as I’m not muscle built and got a little pot-belly but when I’m walking around with a big booty sista wearing only a sundress, thong and flip-flops these brothas be looking at my girl like why she with him? That is where all this PUA nonsense begin. The lame brothas objectified my girl or any pretty girl hanging with a dude as a dumb b*tch who chose that dude “game” over his “game” and he believe he had better “game” to offer her. So him and the rest of the lame brothas hook up online and create a PUA culture that talks about how they think they can manipulate women with “game” and make a woman see things his way. I’m pretty sure they talking about macking hoes, playing with these chicks mind and all that other sissy ass crap before going into their bathroom, jerk off and go to bed. These PUA dudes are too stupid to realize the reason my girl is with me is because she has a mind of her own and have the freedom to choose who she want to be with. But a PUA dude strongly believe his “game” or “mack lessons” can get a chick and he bragging to other dudes instead of just being friends and cool with a sista. However, in the black community the sistas must understand that the PUA characters will target the path to least resistance and that is the young black sistas in their young teenage years. This is who the PUA characters will bring their so-call game too, driving around in cars, flashing jewelry and cash and the young sistas are conditioned to believe that a brotha need to have “game” to get with her. The other scenario is where the ghetto boys are sitting around talking their PUA “mack game” and how they can get p*ssy and start naming girls they can get. All of this is structured game targeting a young black woman during her teenage and young woman years by the black community, with Cathy Hughes and Radio One playing songs portraying young sistas as objects to have sex with and hang on a brotha shoulder as a trophy. So how can the sistas deal with PUA in the black community? We have to realize that PUA culture in the black community prey mostly upon young black sistas and these young sistas become trapped by becoming strippers chasing money, dating drug dealers, getting pregnant and messing around with older perverted men. We have to teach the young brothas about PUA culture because young brothas can easily believe he need to run “game” on a young sista instead of just being a good friend or have things in common other than getting some from each other. Black Women Have to Collectively Fight Negative Media Against Black Women. If black women do not take a stand right here and right now against negative black media, everything else do not mean shit. If a black woman cannot show the younger sistas she is fighting the fight, the younger sistas will not respect her or whatever she say or try to do. Black women need to stop supporting these negative black radio stations and start collectively and vocally boycotting and show they give a damn about young sistas. The best way to win over young sistas is to fight a perceive enemy of young sistas – make black media that enemy of the young sista and you older sistas get together and fight and fight hard. Young Sistas Need to be Taught About the Game. Please teach the young sistas to not believe brothas should approach her with game. In fact, you need to take the initiative and strong initiative to teach the younger sista that she is in control of her life and who she should be with. Teach the young sista how to detect a quality brotha and teach her how to make herself available to a good brotha and have a conversation, even if she had to start it. Eliminate the whole concept in the black community that some black dude bringing “game” and trying to sing like he Tyrese and ish is the kind of guy a young sista should wait for and respond to. Young Brothas Need to be Taught How to Be Friends First. Young black men has been conditioned to view black women as a booty quest and you see the online videos where you see young black men chanting “d*ck her pass” and that’s the culture young sistas have to live in. So when a young guy approach a chick looking for booty and she says “let’s be friends” and he takes that as a rejection and resent her. To avoid this whole setup, teach the young brotha to take the initiative to be friends with sistas first. Teach brothas that he should learn to grow a relationship and also it is helpful he do this to avoid getting a crazy ass chick pregnant and deal with her nonsense for the next 18 years. Nothing But Quality Brothas. Teach young sistas how to find quality brothas. Take her to the airport and let her look at quality brothas taking flights around the country. Screw church and those fake snake in the grass religious brothas – take the young sista to events where you see brothas dedicated to crafts, art, volunteering for a cause and let her see what real quality brothas look like. And you sistas need to stop dating these knuckleheads around young sistas talking about he got muscles and other superficial dumb ass shit that ends up with black culture having dysfunctional families and unhappy broken lives. The number one problem with black women is they never been taught to recognize a quality brotha and she working off physical look, shallow assumptions and perceptions. Teach the Young Sista to Be Independent and Not Clique Up. When your sista become part of a girlfriend clique, she definitely set herself up to be approached only with “game” but the worst kind of game. Now dudes are cool with one girl in the clique who working the young sista to give it up to a brotha at her school and the young sista is sexually pressured to stay in the in-crowd. Instead, teach the young sista to be independent and have a wide net of friends and don’t get caught up in a clique. Be very f*cking explicit when talking to a young sista about cliques and describe what they are and the damage and why she should be her own woman. Remember that is sistas are both the enabler and disabler of these PUA characters. The sistas have to work and take seriously the PUA culture in the black community because black PUA targets young black sistas for marginalization through teen pregnancy. Upcoming Hustle Space magazine has a special section already reserved for young sistas in our youth edition on how to live a teenage girl life free of sexual pressures and avoiding negative media and influences as a young black teenage girl. Both the real brothas and the real sistas out there got to stop this cycle of PUA against our black girls and we got to do our part. But most important and this is what I’m going to end this article with – we cannot have just one single mom talking to her daughter, you need at least 17 to 20 grown black women talking to that daughter and real-talking that young sista into not falling into the trap of these lame PUA brothas targeting young girls. It going to take an army of sistas to deal with a young sista – don’t let one mother fight by herself because it will be a personal battle that mother cannot win. I cannot say much about the PUA brothas because the truth is, if the sistas do not fight this battle and realize they hold the cards, then it is the sistas who are allowing the PUA culture in the black community to target and marginalize our young sistas.

19 thoughts on “The Black Woman Guide to Protecting Her Daughter against Black Male PUA Culture

  1. Very much appreciate this article Ed. This needs to STOP completely and while things are warming up.

  2. Very good information. We need to embrace changing of views in our community, in order to continue growing.

  3. All what you spoke of to me is what I call a sucka’s mentality.The focus should never be 17 – 20 women speaking to a girl. Can you imagine the negative poisonous advice she would receive from some who may be a man hater or worse a scorned woman with an agenda? If anything she should have her father in her life as well as her mother directing and guiding her life. Young brothers need guidance as well from wise grown men and women’s perspective. This PUA culture you speak of is misguided. The PUA method is a method practiced mainly by White and Asian men who consider themselves artists at what they do in picking up unsuspecting women. The “Game” you speak of is what you may say has been cultivated by Black men in order to survive in this upside down society we live in. We are at war with the lost “what can you do for me financially” mental disorder of most Black women v.s. the interdependency concept of what can we do together? The “Game” is about uplifting self esteem, having communication, knowing your value as a man and how to apply it in everyday life not just toward ladies. Perhaps it is your demographic that you dwell in my man. Im from San Francisco, California and I see the return of Jezebel. I see the good girl turned bad every time I look up and I not going to purchase or worship her tail like many do, but I will get inside of her mentality to discover if she qualifies to be my lady or perhaps wife material and if not then I’ll send her back to you for the pillow talk of idle friendship.

    1. President Obama said it best:

      “I don’t think I have to interpret those statements for you; they kind of speak for themselves. When people — when ignorant folks want to advertise their ignorance you don’t really have to do anything, you just let them talk. And that’s what happened here.”

      I really want the women and real men notice what DGM said and this newcomer “The King of Verbal Seduction” is trying to sneak into the room. Don’t listen to what they say, just look at who they are. These ain’t real men – plain and simple and they are the example of embarrassment we have for black men in our community today.

      Do you know what a real black man would have posted in response to this article? Ayikushi in the comments above posted what a real man supposed to post – he will share this information with his wife and daughter. That’s all a real black man need to say, not post up some diatribe silly ass opinion and perspective that has nothing to do with manhood and being a builder and provider for the family and community.

      This article was meant for black women, why are these black dudes even interjecting themselves in the conversation? I hope you sistas out there are really learning from all of this you are seeing going on right now.

      1. Oh … so we want to say now that I am not a “real black man?” Ed, PUHLEAZE. I am the definition of a REAL. REAL as in “AUTHENTIC … NO SUGAR COATING …. NO PRETENSES, AIRS, or FACADES … BLUNT TRUTH.” All of my books and my radio shows are about being REAL. You need to do your research son.

        You are nothing but someone (Black male or Black woman pretending to be a male) who PLAYS UP TO WOMEN and INSULTS BLACK MEN. There are DOZENS like you out here. Us REAL MEN call you “Captain-Save-A-Ho” types. You look to earn brownie points from women by portraying all (Black) men as being “no good.”

        If you came on my talk radio show, you would get shredded to pieces. I would embarrass you in the worst way. And that is why you respectfully declined my invitation. You are not ready to debate a REAL BROTHER.

        Marinate on that son / young lady …. whoever you are.

  4. Mr. Ed It seems you again are confused and ignorant at what you are speaking on or to. I am a Man, a Real Man and a Real Father indeed, a proud single Father raising three kids, two sons and a daughter all by myself. I don’t need your validation to speak my beliefs. You didn’t like what I said and it seems it really stirred you but you should not let your emotions get the best of you in this case. My opinion was that, an opinion in response to yours in which I disagreed with. I have that right to disagree with you don’t you think? And as a real man does I stand on what I said with no apologies to you. If you are going to speak on the Black family cultivating the youth then you cannot leave the Black man out of the equation. If you are going to speak of Black men using “Game” then you cannot make blanket statements with little or no facts, and if you are going to publish your thoughts online be prepared for a response you may not like. I don’t know who you are but I see what you are. You are a person standing on muddy soil talking loud and saying nothing and continuing the agenda to destroy and separate the Black family. One thing I have learned from the so called “Game” is not to pontificate or argue with a woman or a man with a woman’s mentality.I hope as well sister’s out there are seeing this as well as young brotha’s.

    1. Call the tow truck Ed . . . . because Brother D.G.M. just BROKE YOU DOWN. LOL.

      Much respect D.G.M.

    2. Is this the DGM message that was supposed to squash me? The King of Verbal Seduction? Are you serious? Please explain how this supposed to squash me.

      Maybe you two are missing the point – the nature fact of you two guys trying to make yourself heard on an article geared towards women and you are not contributing anything except a fake battle with me speaks volumes. You don’t have an issue with me – you came here because you had an issue with black women and don’t try to make it seem I’m the problem or yall “squashed” me or whatever – yall the ones here running your mouth.

      This is the core point that you two are failing to grasp and failing to understand what you guys are saying, no one cares because it ain’t real man stuff, bro. Where did you get the memo saying someone gives a damn what a black man think instead of what he is about? WTF are yall even talking for here? Why? And yall don’t even get it!

      DGM convo above is just plain worthless, it’s has no value…and everything you present so far King of Verbal Seduction has no value either….so for you guys to provide worthless information claiming yall some real man..we can only go on what we see by your actions, not the persona you want to portray.

      And one last point – there is absolutely no way you can squash me or handle me or whatever you want to call it. I’m the one that written the article, you are the one that became attracted to it. How do you know this was just a honeypot i scripted using my own data intelligence gathering skills to attract cats like you to be offended and respond? Wouldn’t that be a strategy i discussed to the sistas on how to acquire and track cats like you in the last article? Yeah, thought so….

  5. I think its healthy to have good dialogue here. Im also glad to see some brothers chime in. We need ideas of resolutions not attacks from either side of an opinion.

    1. Well tracie …. I sometimes have a bad habit of “attacking” when I feel like I am being “attacked.” Ed essentially said I was “ignorant” and not representative of a “REAL” Black Man. I resent such an invalid accusation. I can be intellectual and eloquent when I need to be (similar to my good brother D.G.M.), but I can also be harsh and hardcore when I need to be too.

      I just simply have a problem with Black men and Black women who attempt to blame 90-99% of the problems in today’s dating scene on men, and Black men in particular. It literally irritates me. Has the behavior of many Black men contributed to more lies being told and more ‘manipulative head games’ being employed? Sure. But Black women have also told their share of lies and employed their share of manipulative head games as well. Many of the female guests on my talk radio podcast program have even expressed that.

      There is no “one gender” that is the “bad guy” today. Both genders must share the blame for the flaws and weaknesses in today’s steadily declining relationships between Bruthas and Sistahs.

      My thoughts.

    2. Tracie your missed the original message here – there is no debate or dialogue and that’s purely being blind.

      These guys are hellbent on their ideology and you trying to reason with radicalization.

      Do not call this crap a dialogue or a debate and recognize two morons trying to troll a comment section when you see it. They have no purpose here and if you should realize a person who call himself “art of verbal seduction” is the actual black male PUA culture I speak of. Don’t equate them with me and I take offense to you putting me on the same level as them in a reference to a “dialogue”

      As the late Maya Angelou said, when you see someone doing something…believe it.

    3. You’re right Ed on one thing …. what just transpired was not a “debate.”

      D.G.M. SQUASHED you. Like a big boot stepping on an ant. If it was a boxing match, it would have been a Round One knockout.

      You are not intellectually capable of truly engaging in a “debate.” Evidence: You love to hurl personal insults at people. Men who can truly engage in dialogue and debates do not need to hurl insults for no reason.

      You have nothing to stand on Ed other than your own narrow-minded, invalid opinions of Black men.

      1. I haven’t read what DGM said but you indicated he squashed me like a bug…the fact you and DGM is even trying to have a conversation on this article is the real comedy..

        This article was written for women..why are you here? You here only to push your agenda. Don’t underestimate me or the smart people in the room. We will let you run your mouth for a little bit before we move in and handle..

        You a dude on this article cheerleading a comment DGM said..ooh he smashed me….did y’all actually claimed you were real men? Thanks for the comic relief

  6. Very good piece, thanks for writing it. You’ve done a public service. Don’t worry about the butthurt PUAs; the Kool Aid they serve these guys is really strong and laced with testosterone and dopamine. Forgive them, for they know not what they do, and there are apologists and enablers of this crap all over the Internet, making it much harder for them to see how sick this all is. Try, anyway. I know it’s a challenge, what with them ruining the very fabric of what makes humans human and all.

    By the way, it’s as much a problem for other races, believe me. Have a good day. 🙂

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