How Sistas Lost the Global Booty Game

kimmy Since the beginning of time, black women were the standard of what a real booty look like. If we look at many tribes in Africa, you will the African women do ritual dances with their booty to attract their future husband meaning the brothas been loving booty since God first sculpted one on a woman. To us brothas, booty is more important than food, more important than drinking water and what every brotha talk about growing up is getting a with woman with a nice big booty. In the 21st century, the sistas walking about with a nice booty have developed an overall stank attitude thinking she can pick and choose brothas and have us brothas fight each other for her. Many sistas wanted to see if they can game other brothas and play with other brothas emotions by teasing them with her booty and see if she can get something like a free meal at a restaurant or bottle service at the club. What sistas failed to realize was there was a global competitive market for sistas with booty rapidly emerging and eventually, the sistas found out she is not the only booty in town and also found out she been sideswiped by Ms. New Booty who came to the scene with a better butt game for the brothas to be happy about. In this article, we are going to discuss in detail how sistas failed at the staying competitive by just sitting on her ass not realizing other women were coming on the scene with a nice booty to showcase for the brothas. The sistas who had a sense of entitlement thinking everything revolved around her booty made the same mistake of not recognizing we live in a global economy and marketplace and brothas and sistas are going to have to competitive against people on the other side of the world and will lose out if we do not stay competitive. With that said, let’s talked about how the sistas lost the global booty game.

Sistas Failed to Compete Against Emerging Global Booty

nice That woman in that pic..look at her, just as fine as she can be. Her body measurements are perfect in every dimension and she got a figure that sure got my attention. Straight poetry in motion, the kind of sight I like to see and I cannot help but get excited looking at her anatomy. I mean, look at her..she is built and she is stacked and got all the curves a man like. (update: no one realized this is the first versus to Bad Mama Jamma, by Carl Calton) The sistas did not see these kind of emerging global sistas coming into the marketplace who love some brothas in America. Sistas from Columbia, Lebanon, Turkey, Ukraine, Nebraska, Brazil, and Argentina are now coming up due to emerging economies and growing middle class giving these type of sistas the mobility to move more around the world. And now these global sistas are here in the USA and showing off what they got and we brothas are paying attention. What our sistas did was try to play us brothas like she can keep us brothas thirsty and see which one of us is stupid enough to do her bidding just to be seen with her big booty. Sistas also thought she can diss some brothas and promote other brothas like she playing a pick and choose game and her decisions matter as who is a real man and who is not based on who she choose to be next to. I saw sistas with a big booty play these negative games against brothas out on college campuses and corporate workplace but recently, we are seeing hot thickness chicks from India bringing food for brothas to try out, Malays with a curvy apple booty coming around showing she can shuffle dance and Chinese women with long hair, legs and hips talking like they ghetto and pulling out a wad of cash and want to ball out the shopping mall with a brotha. Then you have Latina women with a loco culo showing us brothas how to do Latin dance moves and learn some Spanish and the sistas are now sitting back with her arms crossed all maaad watching us brothas enjoying these other sistas from emerging nations who also got a nice booty also but being friendly and cool with us bros. In addition, we brothas are seeing a massive uptick in women trying to look like KimK, even going under the knife to have that booty to sport around.

Myth: Asian Women Do Not Have Booty

unicorns When you find Waldo, go and ask Waldo if Asian chicks have booty because he will tell you the truth. I noticed the red thick chick in the pic above got dimples too – now that’s an Asian cutie with a booty. There are a lot of Asian women out there extremely thick and curvy and yes brothas, they do exist and not unicorns. You brothas will find thick Japanese sistas in Osaka and Sapporo for example and mostly tropical south and in mountain areas in other Asian countries – don’t let nobody tell you brothas thick big booty Asian chicks don’t exist – they do exist and the sex is awesome bro. See, the military brothas over in Asia know the truth about these stacked Asian chicks but ain’t going to tell the rest of us brothas because they trying to keep it to themselves and they selfish too.

Sistas Failed to Maintain the Shape/Wellness of Her Booty

The other women out there have developed a discipline to keep their booty shapely and firm. When I heard the word “firm” I thought they were talking about some hard feeling booty but when I got up on this white chick with a “firm” booty while we were dancing, I didn’t realize it felt so soft and gel-like and it had some bounce with the ounce. Also during sex, a firm shapely booty is easier to command and control with each stroke versus the sloppy fat booties sistas be having that be flapping all over the place. The majority of sistas with a booty do nothing but lay on a sofa and do very little activity. Sistas with a big booty just sit on the passenger side of a nice car some dude is driving her around and she is just laying on her stomach having rear-entry based intercourse with a dude, that’s pretty much all the activity a sista be doing. Over time after having babies and laying around the house, these sistas booties become out of shape and even worse, sistas be having a belly bigger than her booty from not working out and not staying in shape. You can tell the quality of a sista on how she maintain her booty. If a sista is walking around with tight jeans and got a gut and rolls on her side even though she got a booty, that is a sign she is lazy and don’t take care of herself and trying to have someone take care of her while she does nothing. A chick that works on her own booty, keeps it maintained and firm let’s you know she taking care of her business and don’t need a man to control her and she is the type of chick who can help you in a relationship as a partner instead of you doing all the work like most of these big booty sistas be wanting a brotha to go out like.

Sistas Failed to Establish Fashion Apparel around Her Booty

dorightthing In 1989 every brotha went to see Do the Right Thing not to see a “conscious” Spike Lee Film but to look at Ella hot ass in those neon pink stretch polyester bike shorts. Every brotha from the late-80s knew about those polyester bike shorts and how a thick sista with a nice booty wearing them would make a brotha feel walking down the street and seeing a sista wearing it well. Now here is the deal – sistas knew this kind of clothing back in the 1980s like Flippo Totti jeans (there are no pictures on the Internet to show you brothas how awesome a sista ass looked in Flippo Totti jeans back in the 1980s – maybe Olivia Brown wore them on Miami Vice but that’s the best lead I can think of) would turn the brothas out and the question is – why haven’t sistas became entreprenuers and market these type of clothing that showed off her booty? What the sistas did was kept being consumers of clothing and sistas focused on the jeans market buying up expensive jeans from Guess to Girbaud to True Religion that did not shape well with a sista curves. And you damn right – Girbaud jeans were not designed for black women and made a sista ass look box-shaped, Girbaud should have been thrown off the Oprah show for designing those jeans like that back in the days. But the sistas did nothing but consume expensive jeans and wore fashion labels and did not create products that showcase her own booty. lululemon However, other women started showing off their booty creating stretch pants or yoga pants to show off their booty. The same stretch pants concept wore by sistas back in 1989 by Ella in Do the Right Thing are now coming back and startup companies like Lululemon have become a billion dollar firm in a short time selling yoga pants. The market for yoga pants has blown up so much that traditional women apparel have suffered financial losses and going out of business. Even Ladies Footlocker is shutting down to convert into a store that focus on selling yoga pants. (Update: Dick's Sporting Good also announced they entering the yoga pants market, opening up "lifestyle/wellness" stores). Sistas have failed to capitalize on creating booty clothing as entrepreneurs and instead chose to be consumers spending their “disposable income” on expensive denim brands that don’t even do her booty any real justice, frustrating brothas out there. And brothas are looking at other chicks wearing yoga pants with their booty all out and looking firm and stuff and realizing there are alternatives out there for a bro to consider.

Sistas Failed to Establish Businesses to Pamper Her Booty

When a brotha deal with an American sista, he will be annoyed hearing her talking about going out to get her nails done and hair did because he don’t care and will give her a fake compliment. But a brotha dating a Brazilian or Columbian chick will hear that chick say she going out to get her booty done and a brotha start grinning ear-to-ear because that is what he likes to hear. Other cultures have “spas” and “clinics” where they can get their booty shaped up, trimmed, shaved, smoothed out and a brotha will notice the difference when she come back and a brotha be all happy and stuff. Sistas be leaving her booty all hairy with bumps on it and stretch marks looking like tiger stripes making a brotha want to rub a whole tube of cocoa butter all on her poorly managed ass just to clean all that hot mess up. You brothas know exactly what I’m talking about and don’t lie – you get with a sista with a nice booty and she pull down her pants and you see tiny red bumps, stretch marks and wrinkle spots and discoloration and you be like WTF but you go ahead and hit it anyway. What we see is sistas have done nothing to take professional care of her booty and sistas are not working together to take care of each other booty, not even for profit and not realizing the market demand for booty pampering and care. See the Latina chicks are getting together to make sure their booty are looking good for their men but the sistas in America can careless about having a nice booty for their man and just covering up their butt in some jeans. That’s why these sistas don’t want to go the beach and stuff, talking about they don’t want to get their hair wet – she probably talking about all that hair on her ass she don’t want to get wet, real talk .

Sistas Failed to Maintain Respect For Her Booty

fail This is the biggest failure because sistas be giving up her booty to all kinds of sorry brothas out there on the streets. Then a sista put tattoos all on her booty knocking down the real estate value of her butt. And sistas be on Instagram and Facebook operating as an amateur butt model for free entertaining broke dudes posting up Kevin Hart “damn you’re fine!” memes in her comment section. A sista defacing her own booty is a clear sign of self-hate and self-disrespect and real brothas take note of a sista that don’t take sacred pride and care of her booty. A brotha treats a sista how she treats her own booty – if a sista do not respect her booty, he will not respect her but if a sista do respect her booty and keep her booty respectable, a brotha will elevate his game up a notch to be with that respectable booty and love it and care for it like a grown man. Proper sistas from other cultures do not deface their booty with butterfly tattoos nor let anybody off the street run all up in her booty. These other sistas have rules on how a brotha should engage her booty and when to touch and when to look and there is a time and place where a brotha and her booty can make the proper introductions. These other sistas teach brothas how to respect the booty while our sistas show nothing but disrespect for her booty turning off real brothas from being serious with her.

Global Competitiveness Allowed Brothas To Be Choosey with the Booty

sittingfence As a result of our sistas failing to stay competitive in the booty game and the growing emergence of new booty from all over the world, we brothas are enjoying the fact we got so many options and can be choosey. At first, the sistas thought they had a monopoly on the booty game and no one had a booty like hers. Then we found out later thanks to global emerging markets and growing middle class women from those markets that there are thick big booty sistas from all over the world that a brotha can pick and choose. Now we brothas are living in a buyer market with nothing but booty for us to choose from and now we brothas can celebrate at all the booty out there available to us! We brothas can now look at different types of booties and determine the best kind of booty we like and no longer have to stay stuck on one kind of booty. This is how global competitiveness disrupts the marketplace and destroys the complacent entitled mentality of the status quo. The sistas have failed to recognize opportunities around her booty, underestimated her global competitors who got booty also and as a result, lost the loyalty of the brothas who can now be choosey with the booty.

How the Sistas Can Win Us Brothas Back and Boss Out the Booty Game

backinstrideagain Despite the losses our sistas suffered by not respecting her booty and failing to stay competitive, the sistas can still win us brothas back to her booty. We brothas want our sistas to step up her booty game and be back on top but the sistas have to take care of her business and realize it is a global competitive world out here and she has to fight to be at the top and stay at the top. Here is what we believe a sista need to do to get back on top of the booty game: Smile. Sistas need to learn how to start smiling instead of looking like she pissed or post pictures with duck lips or some sneer look on her face. A sista smiling can brighten a brotha whole day and probably the rest of his life and fill him up with joy. Smiling will compensate having a flat booty to a brotha - just make sure you pancake sistas start doing those squats. Exercise and Wellness. Sistas need to start taking exercise and eating right seriously to maintain a well-rounded firm butt for a brotha to enjoy. Brothas are realizing after entering the global marketplace the advantages of having sex with a chick with a nice firm butt versus some flappy bird ghetto booty. Also, exercising allow sex to be longer with more endurance and builds up relationships and companionship by focusing on wellness and quality of life. Stop Giving Up the Booty to Anybody. A sista booty is a treasure, a gift and a precious reward for the right brothas. A sista should realize how much of an honor she gives when she allow a brotha to spoon her and be hugging all up on her booty intimately. Sistas should only allow the best of breed have access to her booty and those are the guys who show they about it and appreciate her and created a kingdom for their queen – that means he got money to buy a house and car and raise a family. Build Business Models Around the Booty. The sistas failed to create products and services around her most treasured asset that brothas adore and love more than anything else. Sistas should establish true booty care spas and not backroom butt injection operations. Sistas should design clothing and sell clothing that represent her booty well for the brothas to notice and pay attention. The fashion should not be expensive as all a brotha want to see is the booty and do not be ashamed to market a booty clinic – brothas love the idea of having a sista go to the booty spa because he is excited to see how the end result will look. We brothas want to see our sistas succeed and want to her bring back the glory of her booty so we can be there to respect her booty, admire her booty and fall in love with her booty. To a brotha, booty is more important than drinking water, more important than eating food and sistas are now living in the 21st century where she going to have to be competitive in the global marketplace to keep a brotha attention and loyalty.

8 thoughts on “How Sistas Lost the Global Booty Game

  1. Damn, finally found Waldo. Didn’t know he’d be checking out the fly Asians. Ed, I take my hat off. This is a good one.

  2. “Stop Giving Up the Booty to Anybody. A sista booty is a treasure, a gift and a precious reward for the right brothas. A sista should realize how much of an honor she gives when she allow a brotha to spoon her and be hugging all up on her booty intimately. Sistas should only allow the best of breed have access to her booty and those are the guys who show they about it and appreciate her and created a kingdom for their queen – that means he got money to buy a house and car and raise a family.

    Build Business Models Around the Booty. The sistas failed to create products and services around her most treasured asset that brothas adore and love more than anything else. Sistas should establish true booty care spas and not backroom butt injection operations. Sistas should design clothing and sell clothing that represent her booty well for the brothas to notice and pay attention. The fashion should not be expensive as all a brotha want to see is the booty and do not be ashamed to market a booty clinic – brothas love the idea of having a sista go to the booty spa because he is excited to see how the end result will look.”
    Great post! I can definitely agree with these two. You made some very valid points. Thanks for the post.

  3. Ed, must you go so hard, at least you put some sugar on it and the end. Listen I am not mad at you, I feel the same way you do which is why I tell my sister girlfriends, there are over a billion Chinese, 47 countries in Africa, the men in Cuba are fine, polite and treat you well so there is no need for sisters to have sour faces… waiting to be chosen when there are fine men around the world. Get a passport and put some stamps on it.

  4. Yep, you just stepped on my toes Ed! BUt coming from a sister that doesn’t have a booty, I still do what I can to keep the body right. But you hit the head on the nail where we are more concerned with hair and nails and not our “temple”. I know some women will not like it but you are correct on this!

  5. African American men need to take education more seriously. Why would write rubbish like this to denigrate black women. Women are more than just booty, they are beautiful intelligent beings who give this our world a purpose. I am African and I love black women. The difference between you and |I is that I have not been taught to hate myself by a racist society. Let us learn to learn ourselves and most especially our women. Many black American men have inspired me from Frederick Douglass, W>E>B Dubios, Thurgood Marshall, Booker T Washington, MLK, Malcolm X and more but these days you guys are too infatuated with being street and OG. If you want to gain respect in America and to gain respect America you must gain power, you cannot gain power by being ignorant

    1. “Why would write rubbish like this to denigrate black women.”
      Maybe because it is truth and from experience – have you debunk anything or just gave your shitty ass pro-black fist in the hair afro opinion? On the discussion on global competitiveness, your kufi-wearing response is to bring up some nationalist/race-pride fuckery. You basically ain’t said anything beyond this statement.

      “Women are more than just booty, they are beautiful intelligent beings who give this our world a purpose.”
      Yeah, sure – keep in mind you are a artificial made-up persona online promoting virtual virtues – the rest of us brothas love some booty.

      “The difference between you and |I is that I have not been taught to hate myself by a racist society.”
      From your rambling – you sound basic. Here is the thing – at the end of the day, no one gives a fuck if you hate yourself or love yourself or go kill yourself. You go live your life out to your purpose and be happy with it. No one is going to debate with you whether they love themselves or hate themselves..go fuck yourself..why? Fuck you, that’s why. No one need to answer to you or anybody else on whether they love themselves or hate themselves because that’s their life and their zone, homey.

      “Many black American men have inspired me from Frederick Douglass, W>E>B Dubios, Thurgood Marshall, Booker T Washington, MLK, Malcolm X and more but these days you guys are too infatuated with being street and OG.”
      This is a topic about booty, why you bringing up these old dead dudes? You remind me of Justine Lai (http://weirdtv.blogspot.com/2009/03/all-presidents-gettin-it-on.html) who painted pictures of her getting it on with dead presidents, do you have the same thoughts with these dead black guys you mentioning? Sounds like they aroused you more than inspire you because you ain’t said a damn thing about them that related to this topic.

      “If you want to gain respect in America and to gain respect America you must gain power, you cannot gain power by being ignorant”
      This is where you and every sorry ass outdated archaic psuedo-Pan-African-Hotep-kufi-dashiki clown fuck up at everytime – you need America. You just said “gain respect in America” because the truth is, you Pan-African motherfuckers need America/USA so you can be a perpetual black victim instead of go global and realize the landscape changed in the 21st century. Africans setting up shop in Asia and China while you in the USA talking dumb shit about gaining respect in America – the money ain’t exactly all in America and neither are the opportunities and other black folks got the balls to go out and get it. But you characters need this “America” so you can keep bitching and complaining but will never take that leap of faith like others doing in the African Diaspora to go anywhere.

      This is the 21st century, we live in a global economy. Like everything else – you didn’t add shit to the conversation and just want to take it sideways like you kufi characters want to go sideways with the rest of black America. You pro-blackers have nothing to fucking add to anything except hoping to sidetrack shit. This article is an analysis way above your league and level to understand and you are too simple to try to discuss so you bring your shitty two-bit opinion Malcolm X name-dropping fucking commentary and that “black women are queens” bullshit. You are some curdy ass milk and your expiration date is like 2008 like that pork they fed those schoolkids the other day. Find yourself a new fucking routine and get with the 21st century…

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