A Grown Black Man Response to Crystal Valentine & Aaliyah Jihad – “To Be Black and Woman and Alive”

uggh I see why ugly sistas love salt and vinegar flavored potato chips because that’s all their ugly behind got to offer this world, some salty hate and vitreous vinaigrette. This video came across my social media wire and I quickly severed the social media connection to that chick immediately for even passing along this cray cray crap. In this article, let’s review this video or poem or whatever this crap is and give an honest assessment from a black man and how we black men should respond. The first order of business is to check out the video (warning: the video contain racist language): The very first words that come out of their mouth was mocking us brothas with some “I’m just saying..if she ain’t got no booty, I ain’t trying to hit it..” and I’m sitting here thinking that maybe I should be trying to hit it even if she ain’t got no booty. So you see where this is all going..some of the dumbest most illogical cray cray shit coming out of these ugly ass sistas mouth. Yeah, I said they are ugly because they are ugly and they look and act like the shit stains on my drawas. I’m just saying, none of them got a booty and I’m damn sure not interested in hitting it either. If I was a young black male student and walked by them, I would clutch my textbooks and be like “ugghh!” and walk on by practicing in my head how to say “ni hao” to the chicks I’m trying to holla at - that’s just being honest and truthful and that’s what we going to be in this article. ni hao...ni hao...ni hao! The one thing you learn when you grow up around adversity and negativity is never become ugly like the environment around you - rise above it to be the shining star you are meant to be. Never become a victim or a reactionary to the negative environment you are surround in. If you do become bitter to the negativity, then you become a byproduct of the negative stuff and you will never be the beautiful and shining person you could have been. Because all you will end up being is ugly and that’s what these sistas in this video are, just ugly. These negative ugly sistas reminded me of Jason Black and Dr. Umar Johnson who are also some ugly ass brothas who doing the same thing as these chicks – blaming other people and whining and acting angry on a stage platform with people in the audience agreeing with that negative platform they are on. We black people have choices in our life when we grow up around adversity where we can choose to become a victim or choose to rise above the negative and be greater. You ever noticed I say I’m from the West Side of Chicago but you never hear me talk about I was drug dealing or gang-banging and shit like that? You hear these other cats be trying to brag to you about they grew up hard and did dirt and stuff like trying to brag on the negative environment to get some cool points or whatever. No, what you see me doing is handling serious business, showing brothas and sistas in the hood how to do for self, talk to you guys how to code this and create a solution on this and adopt global practices and patterns and I talk directly to brothas and sistas. And people in the Global Urban Collective know I’m putting in extra work to help build collaborative progress for brothas and sistas to make moves. I didn’t allow myself to become a victim – I rose above the negative people and environment and become the person who will give a damn about the West Side of Chicago and any hood out there and work to empower my people, my community and our younger generation to have it better than me coming up. These two ugly ass broads chosen to express themselves as negative whiny victims – I don’t give a fuck about their ugly ass or their stupid ass poem and they can go suicide themselves like the rest of those dark-skinned red lip stick wearing sistas because they chose to be a victim and not a conqueror of the negative environment that we all are dealing with. You ain’t going to win a damn thing in life being an ugly victim but you will win immediately when you decide you not going to allow this negative environment make you a negative victim and choose instead to dedicate your life to rising above your situation. better We black men are going to do what the fuck we want to do and if we brothas don’t like flat booty dark skinned broads, then we don’t fucking like flat booty dark skinned broads. A bunch of ugly ass broads citing some cray cray poetic bullshit ain’t going to change the way we brothas think either. I really don’t like dating black chicks in 2015 either after all the bullshit I dealt with the sistas. What you sistas don’t get and what you missing the whole point is the reason why we brothas stop dating your flat booty dark skinned ass in the first place. You sistas were negative and full of shit – we brothas decided we are not going to become victims of a negative environment where sistas using cops to attack black men, using the court system to keep a black man away from his children, fucking knuckleheads instead of marrying black men, conspire with liberals to abort our unborn black children and undermine First Lady Michelle Obama watching a show call Scandal and then watch reality TV of sistas fighting each other. No, we brothas made the decision to rise above the negative environment you sistas brought forth and find something better – I found a lot of Arab sistas, Indian sistas, Chinese sistas and Catholic Latina sistas who have core values and show outward respect for the black man that respect himself and made something out of himself and so has a lot of other brothas. Stop being an ugly ass sista and rise the fuck up from the negative environment you keeping yourself in.

32 thoughts on “A Grown Black Man Response to Crystal Valentine & Aaliyah Jihad – “To Be Black and Woman and Alive”

  1. I came across this video on my timeline as well. I will say that these women have experienced negative relationships or whatever they were calling them and brought that anger of their selection bias to an open mic. I’m over hearing about how black women and black men have these types of issues when they continue to choose these relationships whether he is a fuckboy or she is a naive and vulnerable wreck.

    I tell some female friends and associates, just piggy backing off of your last post. You definitely have to change your environment to get a better selection of quality men. Who cares who you have preference for if you want to stop being angry or hate these men then step your skill up and change your environment.

    Just as another example Venus & Serena got backlash from black men and women who edge on this like its a win about them dating other men of color. This is going on like children’s games or something. However, these sistas choose to not be products of their environment and had to attract a better pool of quality men. I choose as well to get my skills up be a woman that own and take responsibility for herself and not be a product of my environment or “ugly” about the situation at hand. Yes I deal with brothas tryna low key diss me when all I want to say is good morning because I know sistas can give them a hard time. Even sistas act the same way hell you can’t win with neither of them and their emotional roller-coaster feelings.

    This is a great article because that and so much more from this bullshit lately is annoying as fuck. Sistas need to just step they game all the way up if they tired of the bullshit from the men who they claiming to have hate for. Focus on you and change your environment and it will change your world.

    1. regardless of what y’all want to think in most cases these women are just like the men they attract but some how want to think she deserve better when she is in fact no better, if she was better she would have class and the last thing a women with class would do is to put her business in the streets cause that is a sure fire way to run a good responsible produced brother away cause a brother who is about something ain’t got no time for a loud mouth drama Queen with a tongue sharper than a two edge sword, typically these types of women keep a lot of drama going on in their life whether they have a degree or not they all act the same degree with a good paying job or not because it’s in them.

  2. Great post, Ed this one surprised me considering your perceived progressive and far left wing liberal bent I would have thought you would have given these mis guided sister Kudos for stepping on a brother every chance they get LMAO…… but no need to cross over to Arab sistas, Indian sistas, Chinese sistas and Catholic Latina sistas just disregard those with a negative disposition don’t waste time debating them trying to change them because they are like this for a reason now days to prove their independence it’s just “sport” amongst some sisters to mock, pick at and antagonize brothers just because they got the right to it’s a national sport now, in that case brothers just move on to another sister with a positive disposition, values you want and need in your mate cause black men and black women need each other, they need to have “A vision” of the further together and come together marry each other, build your families, raise your children, put your money together, live well, enjoy a little bit of it along the way and build generational wealth to pass on to your children and your children’s children.

    1. The web site above is a so-called swirling/divestment full of radicalized hurt black women with hatred towards black men. What is sad is they are no different than the radicalized hurt black men who have hatred towards black women. This whole situation is sad and pathetic.

      Here is the problem – there is no such thing as swirling – it is a phony artificial construct designed to sell books and propaganda. What it does is hurt legitimate interracial relationships by trying to caricature the relationship only to hurt the opposite sex of the same race. So far, this movement is nothing short of a failure and fizzed out.

      All normal black people should find a way to get out of this “hurt/victim” business and work on a solution to cultivate relationships. No discussion or whatever they talking about at that other blog will ever make a brotha like or love some crazy negative poet chicks who talk negative and espouse negativity…

  3. Maya Bee,

    Your comment was deleted because you used terms that you obviously see are not allowed here. Try again.

  4. I want to give anybody reading this article some background because this is kind of funny. Do you see the image in the article with the brotha laying on his back with the white woman smiling directly at you in the photo? I used this photo for the past 5-6 years and every time I use it, the sistas out there go nuts and batty – for the past six years!

    That is what all of this is really about – do not let anybody fool and let you think this is about something else. I had to delete hundreds of vile comments about that picture and photo for the past 6 years when I bring it up. It’s that picture, I tells ya….

    Something about the brotha laying on his back looking calm while the white woman looking into the camera smiling like she got her a brotha piss these sistas off big time! I believe what is going on is the swirling sistas hate this photo because as much as they want to make us brothas jealous of their swirling game, they do not have a photo like this to show in their collection.

    It’s the photo people….for the past six years and it never failed….that photo can break the black Internet on demand whenever you pull it out…

    1. “They do not have a photo like this to show in their collection”

      Are you insane? Google “white man black woman in bed”. Prove yourself wrong as hell.

      1. I just did Aria – no, there is no picture like that. That picture above show a brotha that is “content” and show a woman that is smiling directly in the camera. Show us the picture when you find it. Like I said, 6 years on and off and yall go nuts each and every time.

        The real discussion is why that picture bother you so much? Why are you so against interracial relationships?

    2. I tried to show multiple pics like that, apparently your site won’t allow me post links. The pics I am referring to show “content” white men wrapped up in their pretty black woman’s arms. It was easy as hell to find on Google Images too.

  5. I think it is very sad that you didn’t listen to the heart of these young girls. I think it is sad that you did exactly what they were speaking out about. They were not trying to be negative but talk about their experiences. I don’t care how much we say they need to change their environment some of what we experience is spilling over everywhere. There is a lot of self hate in the black community. Getting a better job is not the only solution. Maybe it’s time to deal with the pink elephant in the room. Again very awful response to the pain of these young women. I wonder what you would have said had this come from a female in your family.

    1. That wasn’t their experience..that is negative portrayal and stereotyping of brothas. No brotha in the world ever said to them about the “true value of their mouth” and no brotha ever said “white women are winning” and all that is intra-racist lies and you and I know it. Nobody talks like that in our community.

      This crap was nothing more than the same junk as PUA – stereotyping the other sex and promoting hate because hate sells to the ignorant….

      Yes, you should deal with the “pink elephant” in the room if that what you call it but this negative poet crap isn’t the way – you rise above the environment, you don’t dwell in it in a bitter manner. This will do nothing but divide….

      You ask about what I would tell a sista? I would ask her why she even picked a guy or been around a guy who felt comfortable enough to tell her about the “value of her mouth” and tell her to take some damn responsibility about the dudes she associate herself with…

  6. Hey, bro. I don’t know who you are, but I wanted to let you know that there is a website called “beyond black and white” and they are going after you like rabid dogs. These are the type of bitter black women you speak of. Every day they’re bitter about something a random black man said. As if you can’t have your own opinion just like they have. You need to know that they are putting your pictures out there and everything. They already have over a hundred comments about you, and they will continue to well into the night and even tomorrow. Don’t worry too much though; those women are nothing more than bitter old tarts and I use them as a form of entertainment. Where I live, most black & white men don’t like black women. When you read the things these black women write, you will begin to understand their way of thinking. Then you will no longer wonder why nobody wants them unless it’s a ghetto type nigga who can’t get over his booty obsession.

    1. War,

      I was at the blog earlier today and they tried to devolve around me but it didn’t work, me staying 100% probably help create those 100+ comments.

      You said they putting my pictures out – what pictures do I got out there? Me smoking weed? Me throwing up gang signs? Or me being a grown man handling business, enjoying life and taking on the world? Seriously, what pictures they got of me that I’m worried about?

      They put someone like me on blast and all you do is blow up my game because cats will see that I’m actually about it – that’s all they doing. Don’t forget – that lady told them explicitly not to visit this blog because she knew those who did would recognize real.

  7. I’m sorry but I watched the video again – vile, racist and disgusting! Don’t even try to co-sign or legitimize this racist crap. That video has nothing to do with being a black woman and alive….

  8. We must stop being apologetic to these grown men. I feel that one of the reasons why black men are free to be disrespectful to black women is because they know that you will always be waiting in the shadows to catch them when they fall. I find it ironic that the natural characteristics that black women have is strangely beautiful in other races of women. I hope that black women broaden their horizons and move on. And, in-order to be a leader one must prove leadership ability and being born with a penis does not qualify one to be a leader. Stop codling these nuts.
    . The white man did not cause the nearly 80% walkaway rate the black man has against his own children and yet black men blame all the ills of the black community on the black women and when they finally succeed in life they literally walk away from everything and put his white woman on a pedestal. We have the problems we have now in our communities because there is NO leadership. We cannot blame white “supremacy” for that. White people are not going to pick us up by our boot straps, we must do it for ourselves but I realize that will minimize the dating pool for black men. Then they expect one-sided loyalty from black women for nothing.

    1. Karen, your last sentence

      “Then they expect one-sided loyalty from black women for nothing.”

      That’s not your problem and you have no control over that. You are trying to focus on things you cannot control and yell at the moon.

      All you is saying is what I already did and we indicated that – we moved on and we are happy. You have not. Rise up and move on and do it for your own path and purpose.

    2. the truth of the matter is due to black people child like mentality your wise wicket enemy have skillfully push both of you the black man and the black women into a unreal world and they set back and watch both of you with delight savage each other, mocking each other, disrespect each other with distain just for sport and y’all think you are somehow empowered, strong, smart and intelligent, when your wise wicket enemy legally freed you in 1965 instead of you continuing the momentum we had and hold hand, move forward to retake our rightfully place in this universe you went to the mud pit and turn on each other and fought a vicious gender war and delighted in tearing each other down again to the delight of our enemy, now you are begging other race of people to love you and wonder why no other race of people respect you even though you got all kinds of credentials, think about it why should they, why would any sane people love someone who clearly don’t love themselves and kind? They didn’t get to where they are by being a fool destroying each other only their lowest would lower themselves to be with you, because of self hate instead of you developing a positive disposition toward each other, respecting and having an affinity towards each other because of your ancestors perseverance and remarkable resiliency here in North America you rather beg your enemy to allow you to pick off your enemy and other race of people cull pile with delight and revel in it. Think about it! Peace.

  9. Ed, obviously you have no empathy for people. Most blacks in the inner city, specifically young black women and men,have huge obstacles rise trying to rise above their environments. As you may know, education in the inner city is dismal. Many young people do not have proper guidance and are left to raise themselves.
    “Ugly”‘rap videos made by Black men destroyed Black women’s images. Its been downhill for Black women ever since. I don’t remember many Black men speaking out about that? As one of the earlier comments stated, no other race of men would allow such despicable rants against their women. It makes Black men look like jerks and fools. Who has respect for men who find it “ok” to call Black young women ugly? Certainly not REAL men.
    Unfortunately, you who hate “ugly, flat ass, dark skinned sistas” will reap what you sow. Karma is real and hate breeds hate.
    Compassion, emphathy, and grace will take you farther in life, more so than hateful barbs hurled at intelligent, attractive, creative, educated, young Black girls. Be the solution. Not the problem.

    1. This is the kind of comment where these sistas want to blame racism and colorism for why they are single and overlook the fact they are some idiots no man got time to put up with.

      This one mumbling about those who hate dark skinned flat booty sistas…and trying to lecture me…..we just got a class of people out here who you brotha and siatas should not even try to save or serve with your business.

      I’m hoping this fake outrage trying to come at this get big enough so I can shut this shit down for good…they obviously don’t know me….

    1. The video is the source of negativity and hate. Its racist, its vile and its ugly. Those ugly sisters chose to communicate this way and what you put out is what you get out.

  10. Greetings. I am a young lady of a darker complexion and I will say that these ladies are only expressing themselves in a positive way. However, is it fair to assume that all men of a black skin tone behave, speak, and treat black women I’m the matter that they spoke of in their spoken word. Absolutely not. I agree with you sir, on part in your article that black women are negative, not all, but some. Most African American women feel as though they have to bash and belittle an African American man because of their environment. Proving, once again to be a product of their environment and upbringing. I respect your opinion. It is very refreshing to understand the male’s view point in these situations. Thank you.

  11. I feel like all you did was prove the point of the girls in this video. I would have had more respect for this article if you did not spend half of the article calling the girls, “ugly”. First of all, the girls are beautiful. Second of all, even if they didn’t meet your standards of beauty, what did calling them “ugly” prove? Absolutely nothing. Third, did you actually listen to the video? The girls aren’t trying to belittle black men. They are looking for the support of their own kind, which they feel they haven’t been adequately getting. Lastly, black girls don’t care if you want to date white, Asians, or whatever. They just don’t want to be put down for their natural looks that are beautiful) but don’t fit the standards of society.

    I really love the new black women movement that’s been increasingly growing and I think some black men are threatened by it. We are finally bringing attention to the injustices we have been facing for YEARS and people are getting angry. That’s fine by me. You pick out the bad ones (the ones who don’t want to listen) and keep the good ones (the ones who love to see us grow) and we keep going strong.

    1. Why all you shallow sistas keep saying I calling them physically ugly? You sistas are saying they physically ugly because that’s how you subconsciously thinking.

      Show me where I talked about the nasty looking stretch marks around ms jihad breasts..never said anything about them physically..

      When you go negative you turn ugly and it shows inside and outside. They are not beautiful saying negative things. That poem was gut reaching negative.

      You do care who we black men date. I bet that beyond black and white site have over 300 comments because this black man went into that hen house. You sistas will never get that kind of reaction from us bros on any forum revealing that is what all of this is about – us bros.

      This is nothing of the ‘women movement’ this is victimization. And no man feel threatened by anybody with a victim mentality.

  12. Ed, or whoever you are, you sound pissy hurt. I watched the poem, and read your comments; among other comments. Throughout their poem, they dialogued typical comments a lot of black men make. From first hand experience, I’ve seen such hashtags as #WhiteGirlWednesday #SnowBunny, and other hashtags. I also read comments from said black men like, white girls are winning, black girls have a mouth, and other misogynoir comments. I found nothing wrong with the poem. Then again thats me.
    Congrats to you for overcoming adversity. However, a lot of people don’t have the same opportunities as you, regardless of if its presented to them.
    Also, your comments about the women being ugly and flat booty did come across as misogynoir. Even though you corrected yourself, to little to late, it didn’t dilute the image you made for yourself.
    And from reading the title of your other blogs it sounds like you hate black women in general. Maybe you do or don’t, however no conscious black women is going to take you serious because of your stage presence.
    Even after reading you comments on this posts, I became uninterested in what you said. For the record, RACISM is defined as the oppression of one race over another through the obvious economic gap between whites and blacks, social constructs and other norms. But you knew that already. Maybe you are referring to intraracism? But they would have had to talk about light-skin vs dark-skin stereotypes, correct me if I’m wrong, but they didn’t mention them.
    At this point I don’t know whether to take your blog serious or not. There is a lot of finger pointing in the black community. Instead of pointing the fingers at black women, take your experience and correct their wrongs that you see. Not all black women are in the same melting pot, just like not all black men are in the same pot as well.

    1. Dre I only let your worthless diatribe here because you appear young to the world. Let me help you get an understanding of things.

      First, no one gives a shit if you take this blog seriously or not. Your opinions does not mean shit to me. Let’s get that understanding first.

      Second I never “corrected myself” or whatever you are talking about. I don’t answer to anybody like that.

      What you need to do Dre is find a real fucking issue to be mad about. People who passionate about this issue usually don’t got shit going on special.

      Their poem was negative and all you trying to do is rationalize the negativity and want someone to give a fuck…we don’t.

      So you can make two choices – think someone gives a fuck about your negativity or put yourself in a situation where you stay positive and make your environment positive.

    2. Dre your chatter is too lightweight for this blog – you are young an it going to take the real world for you to have a conversation fit for this blog…

  13. A poem by young African American females about their experiences with black men should not offended you that much, unless you felt like that poem describes you. Although I am not African American……

    Although I am not African American……

    Although I am not African American……

    Although I am not African American……

    Me: It is obvious you were trying to invoke some sort of authority/privilege based on your racial identity and you are not going to have any platform here for that nonsense. I don’t give a damn what your outside perspective is on this issue.

  14. Here is the problem and probably what most people find hilarious reading from the sideline:

    My article basically says rise up from the negative environment. What these ignorant people out here wanted to do is try to bring negativity that I already risen up from and is beneath me. I cannot feel bad because I changed my life around to be around positive people – what, the positive people supposed to hate me because of negative people acting mad and negative?

    Then they want to defend those two negative racist ugly poets expressing negativity. They want me personally to care about their negativity and they want you guys to care about their negativity….admit, that is what you find funny here. Someone trying to tell you to listen to their hate and negativity and acknowledge it!

    As I grew up in life, I saw people who were subtly trying to discount this turn around and go full steam negative once you found them out and expose them – they went into true colors mode. You guys are doing nothing but witnessing the negative environment these type of African-American sistas want to maintain. All I’m going to say and the brothas in the thread know better – you brothas stay away from negativity and these losers. You smart sistas – don’t allow negativity be your solution to anything in life. You obviously see I’m not worried about them – I mean what are they trying to win? Us acknowledging their negativity? yeah..haha.

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