I will let you know straight up – me and my girls in Japan, we’re chooms. That’s what you need in your life as someone trying to rise up and scale out your empire. I would not be where I’m at today if I did not discover to seek out choom-first relationships.

Brothas and sistas were raised under the dogma that we need to seek out our mates based on “skin folk” propaganda. But what we saw in our culture is brothas treating Black women as sex objects and run from the responsibility of man-orientated work with a woman such as being a father and responsible man for his woman and his community. Then we see sistas walking around trying to verbalize standards on brothas like he has to be making $100,000/year and be 6 feet tall dissing good brothas but she turns around having raw sex with a dude making $27,000/year and 5 feet 6 inches.

See in our community, everybody making up rules and dogma and then try to tell me and you to date Black. We fall for the dogma and sistas feel entitled to act like she is too good for Black men and she can pick and choose among us. And brothas feel entitled to stand around looking at a sista butt instead of her smile to judge if she is worthy of his time and attention. Let’s explain the truth – you not going to get anything real or quality out of this Black identity relationship dogma.

We’re Black Excellence and we have global dreams and global ambitions to build out global empires. We are above the simple-minded low-frequency dogma of Black folks trying to tell me and you who we need to date or be with on our journey that is way above their basic-ass mindset. You are going to need someone who can meet you where you currently standing with your dreams and your current journey. You are going to need a choom.

Brothas, our sistas are not chooms by default. I walk around and see these sistas acting like she is on some better-than-stuff. Brothas, you got real options out there in this world and for every brotha that exists, there are dozens of fine women he can choose from, no matter how ugly that brotha is. Sistas, you don’t have to put up or participate in a Black culture that objectifies you and wants sistas to play around with broke-ass marginalized brothas trying to act hard. Plenty of dudes all around the world that can take you there than a brotha is too broke, too low frequency to accomplish. You sistas need a choom as well.

I did not realize what a choom was until I started dating women from outside the USA for the past 10+ years. I was growing up with sistas telling me what kind of brotha she wants, the women I was dating in outside the USA were “fun girls” and down-friends from day zero of meeting and not playing “prove yourself” games. But they supported my empire-building mission and talked business while cooking together and watching how-to videos together - sistas want me to turn into something first before she starts coming around me smiling and stuff. There was also a general concern for my health and well-being.

As a Black man, I had a lot of negative behaviors I acquired dealing with the toxic environments in Black dating. I realize a lot of that negative energy was holding me back and I was dealing with a lot of saboteurs who were trying to steal my joy because of the dogma a Black person should not be very happy in a Black relationship – we should have some “humility” or “shame” to bring us down to earth, a lot of our people act this way in Black relationships. My choomba saw this in me and spoke and told me and as a result, I adjusted my behaviors and attitudes that I didn’t know I was expressing as a defense mechanism being in toxic relationships among the Black dogma culture.

Really, we are in a new paradigm and things are changing. You are not going to scale up globally dealing or dating these low-frequency Black identity characters in our community. You cannot go to Singapore with them and handle Southeast Asian financial expansions – you need a choom to handle that. You cannot work on your hustle after work hours with them, they want you sitting with them watching reality TV shows with low-frequency drama. You need a choom that will watch CNA or NHK with you to learn how to startup a business or market conditions and have the same goals as you to build and grow as a power couple.

I would not have finished up my journey or have inroads in Tokyo if it weren’t for my Japanese chooms. You know about those “Black in Japan” making up identity-based dogma trying to play games with me. I went straight to real Japanese to handle things for me. All I think about is my choom, I don’t care who else I’m dating here in the USA while Japan has me and my choomba separated, nothing compares to my choom. You know full well when I step foot in Japan again, my choom got everything sorted for me.

That’s what you need in life – you need a real choomba who will be there for you, especially when it comes to the moment of truth, the time to grind and when the rubber hit the road. You don’t want to be around some brotha and sista and their petty broke fronting and flexing when you trying to do big things. Find a real choom and take your choom search out of our community away from the ignorant dogma our community puts upon us. Having a real choomba that has your back is going to be a key factor in how far and wide you will move in this world.